エピソード

  • From Rupture to Repair: Relationships, Emotional Regulation, and Our Social Brains, with Dr. Tina Bryson

    From Rupture to Repair: Relationships, Emotional Regulation, and Our Social Brains, with Dr. Tina Bryson
    2025/02/03
    Our brains hold our relational history—all the joys, all the ruptures, all the repairs. And even in the most difficult childhood or parenting circumstances, the science of relationships and connection can give us hope for whole-brain and whole-life transformation.Therapist, bestselling author, and mom—Dr. Tina Payne Bryson is seeking a connection revolution that brings neurobiology and practical relational wisdom to bear on both how we were parented, how we parent, and how we relate throughout our lifespan.In this conversation with Tina Bryson, we discuss:The science of childhood relational development and growth into strong, adaptive adultsThe brain as our most social organ—capable of holding a lifetime of relational and emotional historyHow to emotionally co-regulate with another person to achieve a calm, peaceful, and vibrant relationshipNeuroplasticity and our ability to change with intention toward our deepest held valuesAnd we explore how the science of connection, attachment, and interpersonal neurobiology sheds light on how we were parented, and impacts how we might parent ourselves and how we relate to everyone.Books by Dr. Tina BrysonThe Way of Play (Tina’s latest book!)The Whole-Brain ChildNo-Drama DisciplineThe Yes BrainThe Power of Showing UpFollow Tina BrysonTinaBryson.com Instagram X The Center for ConnectionShow NotesDr. Tina Bryson: an expert in neurobiology, parenting, child development, and attachment theory.Highlighting Tina’s unique perspective as both a clinician and science-engaged researcher.This conversation focuses on parenting, but it’s relevant for everyone—whether you’re a leader, mentor, or someone reflecting on your own upbringingThe importance of connection, attunement, and emotional regulation in today’s world."I feel so aware that this is not an easy time to be a child or a teenager in the world."Kids today face unique challenges that are very different from previous generations:More stimulation, information, and pressure than ever before.Earlier onset of puberty and adolescence, with young adults taking longer to launch."We often talk about the challenges of youth, which are absolutely real, but we don’t want to forget that in many ways, the world is actually safer."Positive shifts in youth well-being: fewer teen pregnancies; safer environments (cars, car seats, public spaces)l greater awareness of mental health, substance use, and emotional well-beingWhat Do You Say?: How to Talk with Kids to Build Motivation, Stress Tolerance, and a Happy Home, by William Stixrud and Ned JohnsonThe brain is a social organ—we are profoundly shaped by the people around us."A huge contributor to some of the struggles youth are having is because their grownups are not thriving."Interpersonal neurobiology teaches that children’s well-being is tied to their caregivers’ ability to regulate their own emotions.Takeaway: Parents who are anxious, reactive, or dysregulated create environments where their children struggle to regulate their emotions."The greatest gift we can give each other is a calm presence."“History is not destiny.”Emotional offloading or outsourcingSafe haven or safe harbor: cozy, safe, calm“My mom will never listen.”Understanding teenagers“Please don’t chase your child and force connection.”Non-eye contact feels less intrusive and they’ll open up moreUnderstanding Attachment & The Four S’s: Safe, Seen, Soothed, SecureSecure attachment is a key predictor of well-being in children and adults.Attachment is built through repeated experiences of the Four S’s:Safe: "Do I feel physically and emotionally secure with this person?"Seen: "Does this person understand and acknowledge my emotions and experiences?"Soothed: "When I’m in distress, does this person help me feel better?"Secure: "Do I trust that this person will be there for me consistently?"Set an intention: "When my child walks through the door, I want them to feel at rest, safe, and accepted."Practical Parenting Tip: If your child pushes you away, don’t force connection. Instead, say: "I can see you need some space right now. I’m here whenever you’re ready to talk."Managing Teen Independence: When teens ask for space, don’t take it personally. Instead, try: "I’m here if you want to talk later.""Would you be open to a short walk or helping me in the kitchen?"The basics of attachment theory: John Bowlby and Mary AinsworthMama BearsNot just brain, but whole nervous systemSecure Relating: Holding Your Own in an Insecure World, by Sue Marriot and Ann Kelley"Without awareness, we don’t have choice."—Dan SiegelHistory is not destiny. We can rewire our brains and create new, healthier patterns in relationships.The availability of your presence creates a secure environmentRegulation & Emotional ResilienceDefinition of Regulation: The ability to monitor and modify emotional states rather than reacting impulsively.It’s NOT about being emotionless—it’s about ...
    続きを読む 一部表示
    1 時間 37 分
  • Cultivating the Conscience: MLK on Love, Disobedience, and Community, with Dr. Lerone Martin

    Cultivating the Conscience: MLK on Love, Disobedience, and Community, with Dr. Lerone Martin
    2025/01/20
    To realize MLK’s vision of a Beloved Community, we’re all called to live from a moral conscience that interconnects and permeates society with justice and peace.Working at the intersection of politics, religion, and education, Dr. Lerone Martin of Stanford University is carrying forward the legacy of the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. in a social and historical context desperately in need of renewed moral imagination, connection across racial and economic divides, and the transformative power of love.In this conversation with Lerone Martin, we discuss:How his spirituality integrates with the meaning of education and formationThe legacy of the Rev. Martin Luther King Jr., his vision of thriving and justice, and the relevance of his life and writings for the contemporary worldThe role of emotion and affect and music in Christian faith and spiritualityWe dive into the core elements of MLK’s famous “Letter from a Birmingham Jail”We explore the joint power of courage and love in non-violent actionWe look at practical insights about the kind of morality that leads to thriving,And we close by asking the question posed in Martin Luther King’s final book, Where do we go from here?About Dr. Lerone MartinDr. Lerone Martin is the Martin Luther King, Jr., Centennial Professor in Religious Studies, and the Director of the Martin Luther King, Jr. Research and Education Institute at Stanford University.He’s a historian of 20th-century religion and a cultural commentator. He’s written books about White Christian Nationalism in the FBI, as well as the making of modern African American Christianity—as well as a book about MLK’s adolescence and his early sense of vocation and calling.He stays deeply connected to teaching and community service, teaching the “Why College?” freshman course at Stanford, inspiring underserved high school students in Los Angeles and St. Louis, and developing programming and teaching courses for the incarcerated.Visit the King Institute online at kinginstitute.stanford.edu or follow him on X @DirectorMLK.Show NotesLerone Martin’s spiritual background and early Pentecostal faith, concerned with personal moralityTeaching and Preaching“Why College?” Course at Stanford UniversityIndividual Conscience and Life in the Beloved CommunityJosiah Royce (1913) coined the term “Beloved Community”Lerone Martin on: What is thriving?Connections to communityThriving as living out your vocation, love God, neighbor, and selfSet apart for something“Set apart for the beloved community.”What gave MLK his strength and resilience?MLK’s adolescence and early sense of vocation for ministry, pastoral service, and leadershipWorking in a Hartford, Connecticut kitchen to serve others and catch a vision for Beloved CommunityThe rediscovery and inspiration of MLK on young people todayReferences to Old Testament scripture in civil rights languageCentrality of “One Love” in MLK’s political activism“Let justice roll down!”Benjamin Elijah Mays: The love of God and love of humanity are one love.”Thriving and living with dignity and respectOne love in a pluralistic setting“We can’t just rely on expediency.”Values and guiding North Star for moralityTeaching as a guide for studentsHis spirituality was shaped by his mother’s moral and cultural formation and his father’s ministry.MLK and music“The musicality of his voice.”Spirituality as a jazz man“I Have Been to the Mountaintop” (Delivered by MLK in Memphis on April 3, 1968, a day before his assassination)“I’ve seen the Promised land.”“The musicality of  his voice moves people.”What is the role of music in Lerone Martin’s life: hip hop poetry, awe in gospel music, and improvisation and teamwork in jazz“Music reminds me to be in my body.”Non-violent direct action theoryThe grit of practitioners of non-violent resistance“ There's really nothing passive or weak about non-violent resistance.”“ King would see a love as an action. For him, it's love in action because the means that you   use have to be commensurate  or match the ends that you seek.”Despite the fact that someone’s oppressing you, you still love them.”Changing how we define citizenshipThe effectiveness of non-violent campaigns“Letter from a Birmingham Jail” (April 16, 1963)“In no sense do I advocate evading or defying the law, as would the rabid segregationist. That would lead to anarchy. One who breaks an unjust law must do so openly, lovingly, and with a willingness to accept the penalty. I submit that an individual who breaks a law that conscience tells him is unjust, and who willingly accepts the penalty of imprisonment in order to arouse the conscience of the community over its injustice, is in reality expressing the highest respect for law.”The four steps of a non-violent campaign: (1) collection of facts, (2) negotiation, dialogue, disagreement, or communication, (3) self-purification and self-reflection ...
    続きを読む 一部表示
    1 時間
  • Activating the Science of Happiness: Healthy Habits, Self-Compassion, and Meaning, with Dr. Laurie Santos

    Activating the Science of Happiness: Healthy Habits, Self-Compassion, and Meaning, with Dr. Laurie Santos
    2025/01/06
    Science can change your life. The more we study what makes people develop, grow, learn, and flourish—the more we see how the practical application of scientific findings can help us transform our life and experience—into a life of value, meaning, purpose and true thriving.Yale psychologist Laurie Santos has spent her career investigating the human brain and how it thrives. From her popular Yale course to her podcast, The Happiness Lab, she’s communicating actionable and hopeful lessons for how to build lasting habits, cultivate self-compassion, manage complex emotions, and realign our lives toward meaningful happiness.In this conversation with Dr. Laurie Santos, we discuss:How the mental health crisis affecting young people changed her, and how she teaches psychologyHow our brains lie to usThe role of positive and negative emotions in a good lifeHow feeling good can lead to doing goodThe psychological and relational benefits of faith and spiritualityAnd she offers practical insights, science-backed guidance, and powerful exercises for managing misalignment and difficult emotions.Laurie Santos on how to activate psychological science for more happiness and meaning (from the episode):“Some of these factors that we know scientifically do work. From simple behavior changes like being more social, doing nice things for others, just healthy habits  like sleeping and moving your body,  to mindset shifts, to becoming a little bit more present, to becoming more other oriented, to becoming more grateful, more self-compassionate, and so on.There are shifts that we can make that can have a huge effect on how we actually interact in the world.We need to understand that we're not perfect, we're just human. And we will mess up a little bit too. But it's really the journey that   matters.”About Laurie SantosDr. Laurie Santos is the Chandrika and Ranjan Tandon Professor of Psychology at Yale University and host of The Happiness Lab podcast. Dr. Santos is an expert on the science of happiness. Her Yale course, Psychology and the Good Life, teaches students how the science of psychology can provide important hints about how to make wiser choices and live a life that’s happier and more fulfilling. Her course recently became Yale’s most popular course in over 300 years, with almost one of our four students at Yale enrolled. Her course has been featured in numerous news outlets including the New York Times, NBC Nightly News, The Today Show, GQ Magazine, Slate and O! Magazine. A winner of numerous awards both for her science and teaching, she was recently voted as one of Popular Science Magazine’s “Brilliant 10” young minds, and was named in Time Magazine as a “Leading Campus Celebrity.” Her podcast, The Happiness Lab, has over 100 million downloads.Listen to The Happiness Lab podcastVisit [drlauriesantos.com](http://drlauriesantos.comhttps://www.drlauriesantos.com/)Show NotesHow Laurie got up close with the mental health crisis affecting young peopleSelf-careThe history of The Happiness Course at Yale UniversityThe impact of COVID-19“Things have gotten worse.”Statistics: More than 40% of college students report they are too depressed to functionAnxieties provoked by technology (Jonathan Haidt and Jean Twenge)Stress levels across the developmental lifespanHow our brains lie to usBehavioral changes and healthy habitsMindset shifts and dispositional transformationsThe importance of science for validating spiritual beliefs, values, and practicesSometimes spiritual traditions get some things right, but can also be wrong, and need empirical studyManifestationImagining the positive outcome isn’t as good as planning out the if-then strategy.“The science can help us with the nuance so we can really get things right.”Laurie Santos defines happinessPsychological approach to happiness: “subjective well-being”Positive vs Negative Emotions and the role they play in a good lifeWhy is happiness helpful to us? Is happiness really the goal?The “feel-good, do-good effect”Any cause-based activism requiresLaurie Santos answers: What is thriving?Mindset and behavioral changeNon-judgmental responseSelf-compassion and curiosity“It’s really the journey that matters.”Helping othersBurnout and Self-careStressors that lead to burnoutThe impact of rest on productivityReligion and Happiness: Are religious people happier than non-religious?Social connectionGrowing up CatholicComparing Beliefs vs Behaviors and MindsetsIt’s less about religious beliefs and more about religious practicesCommunal PracticesTranscendent EmotionsOversimplifying transcendent emotionsAwe and Wonder often come along with a disturbance, such as feeling very small, feeling out of control, feeling disoriented, feeling overwhelmed, etc.Dacher Keltner’s tourist studies “Draw yourself in your scene”Feeling tinier, and yet more connected“I’m part of everything, but I am nothing. How do I deal with that?”Evolution and ...
    続きを読む 一部表示
    1 時間 8 分
  • Experience Love — Advent Meditation (Week 4)

    Experience Love — Advent Meditation (Week 4)
    2024/12/22

    Christmas is about the love of God given to us in Christ. Love compels us forward through darkness and light—enabling us to grow and change, connect and relate, forgive and let go, and make a difference and seek justice.

    This December, we’re celebrating Advent with you by offering four guided meditations by Dr. Pam King—considering how to cultivate the Advent virtues of hope, peace, joy, and love into our lives this year.

    We’d be grateful if you considered the Thrive Center in your year-end giving. To make a year-end tax-deductible gift, visit thethrivecenter.org/contribute.

    Don't forget that Season 2 of With & For launches with all new episodes on January 6, 2025!

    Show Notes

    • Jesus said, "As I have loved you, you must love one another.”
    • “Love compels us forward through darkness and light, with its power to connect and heal.”
    • Love for God, love for others, and love for yourself
    • You are beloved.
    • Breathing practice
    • Attuning to sensations of love in your body
    • What are these feelings of love saying about you, your values, your beliefs?
    • What does love say about your deepest beliefs about what matters most in life?
    • Who needs love from you today?
    • How do you live out love in the world?
    • What is one thing you can do to lean into love or to live out love?

    About the Thrive Center

    • Learn more at thethrivecenter.org.
    • Follow us on Instagram @thrivecenter
    • Follow us on X @thrivecenter
    • Follow us on LinkedIn @thethrivecenter

    About Dr. Pam King

    Dr. Pam King is Executive Director the Thrive Center and is Peter L. Benson Professor of Applied Developmental Science at Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy. Follow her @drpamking.

    About With & For

    • Host: Pam King
    • Senior Director and Producer: Jill Westbrook
    • Operations Manager: Lauren Kim
    • Social Media Graphic Designer: Wren Juergensen
    • Consulting Producer: Evan Rosa

    Special thanks to the team at Fuller Studio and the Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy.
    続きを読む 一部表示
    13 分
  • Embrace Joy — Advent Meditation (Week 3)

    Embrace Joy — Advent Meditation (Week 3)
    2024/12/15

    Joy is more than a feeling. It’s a virtue. And it’s something we can cultivate. We live into joy when we encounter who or what matters most to us. It’s associated with our life's deepest yearnings and connection.

    This December, we’re celebrating Advent with you by offering four guided meditations by Dr. Pam King—considering how to cultivate the Advent virtues of hope, peace, joy, and love into our lives this year.

    We’d be grateful if you considered the Thrive Center in your year-end giving. To make a year-end tax-deductible gift, visit thethrivecenter.org/contribute.

    Don't forget that Season 2 of With & For launches with all new episodes on January 6, 2025!

    Show Notes

    • The Shepherd’s Candle—symbolizing joy
    • Joy is more than a feeling. It’s a virtue.
    • Cultivating joy through encountering who and what matters most to us
    • Breathing practice
    • Loving and joyful presence of God
    • How are you experiencing joy in your body?
    • Joy’s insight into our values, opening us up to creativity and connection
    • Does pursuing joy require you to step out of your normal routine?
    • What can you do to bring joy to another?

    About the Thrive Center

    • Learn more at thethrivecenter.org.
    • Follow us on Instagram @thrivecenter
    • Follow us on X @thrivecenter
    • Follow us on LinkedIn @thethrivecenter

    About Dr. Pam King

    Dr. Pam King is Executive Director the Thrive Center and is Peter L. Benson Professor of Applied Developmental Science at Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy. Follow her @drpamking.

    About With & For

    • Host: Pam King
    • Senior Director and Producer: Jill Westbrook
    • Operations Manager: Lauren Kim
    • Social Media Graphic Designer: Wren Juergensen
    • Consulting Producer: Evan Rosa

    Special thanks to the team at Fuller Studio and the Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy.
    続きを読む 一部表示
    11 分
  • Discover Peace — Advent Meditation (Week 2)

    Discover Peace — Advent Meditation (Week 2)
    2024/12/08

    Peace can be elusive, but if set an intention to be instruments of peace—both in offering it and experiencing it—it has the power to transform us. Peace is often an indication that life is in balance and going well, either in the immediate or the eternal sense.

    This December, we’re celebrating Advent with you by offering four guided meditations by Dr. Pam King—considering how to cultivate the Advent virtues of hope, peace, joy, and love into our lives this year.

    We’d be grateful if you considered the Thrive Center in your year-end giving. To make a year-end tax-deductible gift, visit thethrivecenter.org/contribute.

    Don't forget that Season 2 of With & For launches with all new episodes on January 6, 2025!

    Show Notes

    • “Peace can be elusive.”
    • Peace is more than a feeling—it’s an indication that “all is well.”
    • Consider the Prince of Peace, who comes to dwell with us this Christmas
    • Breathing practice
    • What brings you peace?
    • Where do you feel peace in your body?
    • What has been preventing peace for you?
    • “Peace is often an indication that life is in balance, and that life is going well, either in the immediate or the eternal sense.”
    • Setting an intention to pursue peace
    • “Peace I give you.”
    • “May the peace of God be with you and pervade your life this week as you anticipate the coming of the Prince of Peace this Christmas.”

    About the Thrive Center

    • Learn more at thethrivecenter.org.
    • Follow us on Instagram @thrivecenter
    • Follow us on X @thrivecenter
    • Follow us on LinkedIn @thethrivecenter

    About Dr. Pam King

    Dr. Pam King is Executive Director the Thrive Center and is Peter L. Benson Professor of Applied Developmental Science at Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy. Follow her @drpamking.

    About With & For

    • Host: Pam King
    • Senior Director and Producer: Jill Westbrook
    • Operations Manager: Lauren Kim
    • Social Media Graphic Designer: Wren Juergensen
    • Consulting Producer: Evan Rosa

    Special thanks to the team at Fuller Studio and the Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy.
    続きを読む 一部表示
    12 分
  • Take Hold of Hope — Advent Meditation (Week 1)

    Take Hold of Hope — Advent Meditation (Week 1)
    2024/12/01

    Hope is powerful. It’s more than a feeling. It’s a foundation for getting us through even the darkest of times. The season of Advent provides the opportunity to attune to hope, become aware of our deepest hopes and desires, and then align our lives to hope.

    This December, we’re celebrating Advent with you by offering four guided meditations by Dr. Pam King—considering how to cultivate the Advent virtues of hope, peace, joy, and love into our lives this year.

    We’d be grateful if you considered the Thrive Center in your year-end giving. To make a year-end tax-deductible gift, visit thethrivecenter.org/contribute.

    Don't forget that Season 2 of With & For launches with all new episodes on January 6, 2025!

    Show Notes

    • “Hope has the power to transform and involves our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.”
    • Take hold of hope with simple steps of attunement, awareness, alignment, and activation
    • Breath work
    • Attune, in order to feel sensations of hope in your body.
    • How are you experiencing or feeling hope in your body?
    • Notice, don’t judge.
    • What do the feelings of hope say about your deepest desires?
    • Where does your hope come from?
    • How can you align your day with your hope?
    • How can you align with hope to reflect God's desires for you?
    • What is one thing you can do today to lean forward into hope?

    About the Thrive Center

    • Learn more at thethrivecenter.org.
    • Follow us on Instagram @thrivecenter
    • Follow us on X @thrivecenter
    • Follow us on LinkedIn @thethrivecenter

    About Dr. Pam King

    Dr. Pam King is Executive Director the Thrive Center and is Peter L. Benson Professor of Applied Developmental Science at Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy. Follow her @drpamking.

    About With & For

    • Host: Pam King
    • Senior Director and Producer: Jill Westbrook
    • Operations Manager: Lauren Kim
    • Social Media Graphic Designer: Wren Juergensen
    • Consulting Producer: Evan Rosa

    Special thanks to the team at Fuller Studio and the Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy.
    続きを読む 一部表示
    10 分
  • Season 2 Trailer! Reconnect, Repair, Rebuild in 2025

    Season 2 Trailer! Reconnect, Repair, Rebuild in 2025
    2024/11/25

    SEASON 2 is launching January 6, 2025! Subscribe to With & For today!

    How can we reconnect, repair, and rebuild our fractured world?

    We need grounded scientific insight that we connect us with what is good, true, and beautiful. We need wider perspective that guides us toward purpose, community, wisdom, and spiritual health.

    Developmental psychologist, ordained minister, and professor, Dr. Pam King introduces Season 2 of With & For, which launches on January 6, 2025. Inviting guests with expertise in psychology, spirituality, and leadership, this new season will tackle practical questions with courage, openness, and hope—focusing on insights, stories, and exercises for how to reconnect, repair, and rebuild our fractured world. How to find psychological, emotional, and spiritual health, and how to find one another in love.

    This season, episode topics include:

    The power of positive emotions like awe, wonder, curiosity, and transcendence, along with other research backed practices that encourage them.

    The dangers of spiritual and religious abuse, the psychological impact of childhood relational trauma, and how to heal from the wounds of the past.

    The neuroscience behind our emotional health, its impact on how we develop, learn, grow, and make meaning.

    The science behind core human relationships, the emotional vulnerability and power dynamics of intimate romantic relationships, as well as the challenge of parenting and being parented.

    Why and how our moral lives and cultivating virtues are fundamental to joy and thriving.

    The legacies of racial justice and consider the spiritual and moral underpinnings of nonviolent resistance. The healing properties of art, creativity, and beauty, and how they offer comfort and strength beyond words.

    And much more.

    Subscribe to With & For wherever you listen to podcasts and visit us online at thethrivecenter.org/podcast.

    About the Thrive Center

    • Learn more at thethrivecenter.org.
    • Follow us on Instagram @thrivecenter
    • Follow us on X @thrivecenter
    • Follow us on LinkedIn @thethrivecenter

    About Dr. Pam King

    Dr. Pam King is Executive Director the Thrive Center and is Peter L. Benson Professor of Applied Developmental Science at Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy. Follow her @drpamking.

    About With & For

    • Host: Pam King
    • Senior Director and Producer: Jill Westbrook
    • Operations Manager: Lauren Kim
    • Social Media Graphic Designer: Wren Juergensen
    • Consulting Producer: Evan Rosa

    Special thanks to the team at Fuller Studio and the Fuller School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy.
    続きを読む 一部表示
    5 分