My guest today is Ashleigh who came to a workshop back in 2018 – and she’s been sober ever since!

In this episode:-

• Ashleigh realised that there could be a problem when she found herself making lots of rules and then promptly breaking them
• So if you find yourself thinking I'm not going to drink during the week or I'm only going to drink at weekends then perhaps it’s time to reflect on what’s going on
• If you keep making rules and keep breaking them, then just recognize that you do have an issue and you need to make some changes.
• You heard Ashley say that by the end of the workshop she had gained enough new information to realise it would be pointless to try to moderate.
• She had to go all in.
• She knew that she'd crossed thatline into dependence, and that there could be no going back, only going forwards.
• Ashleigh felt confident as she was leaving the workshop. She had her toolkit. She had some new information. She had some new sober buddies.
•  She knew she could do this.
• At the beginning of her journey, she decided to treat herself to all the sweet things that she wanted. She drank hot chocolate. She often had coffee and cake, and she decided to just focus on not drinking which is very sensible.
• At Tribe Sober we say that we can only chase one bunny at a time – so at the beginning we need to focus on the not drinking bunny.
• The dieting bunny can wait a bit – our metabolism will work more effectively when we quit drinking so you might not even need to diet!
• In Ashleighs case she weaned herself off the sugar, off the sweet things, and she's lost an amazing 10 kgs.
• She talked about the many benefits of sobriety and these days she is much less anxious and more confident. So it's been a huge win on every front.
• For Ashley, the workshop was really a turning point in her life, so at the age of just 40, she's got a whole different future ahead.
•  In fact, she fully recognized that if she hadn't taken this step, she could have found herself in a very difficult place in five years time. As she said, it's a slippery slope or indeed a slippery fish, as I think she called it.
• Many of us who’ve quit drinking can look back and realise that taking that hard decision to quit was a catalyst for changing our lives and building a happier and healthier future.

Episode Sponsor

This episode is sponsored by the Tribe Sober Membership Program. If you want to change your relationship with alcohol then sign up today - here is the link.

Help us to spread the word!

We made this podcast so that we can reach more people who need our help. Please subscribe and share.

We release a podcast episode every Saturday morning.

You can follow Tribe Sober on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

You can join our private Facebook group HERE

• PS: How to Leave a Rating/Review in Apple Podcasts (on an iOS Device)

  1. Open the Podcasts app. EASY.
  2. Choose “Search” from the bottom row of icons and enter the name of the show (e.g. Recover Like a Mother) into the search field.
  3. Select the show under Shows (not under Episodes).
  4. Scroll down past the first few episodes until you see Ratings & Reviews.
  5. Click Write a Review underneath the displayed reviews from other listeners. You’ll then have the option to rate the show on a 5-star scale and write a review (you can rate without writing too but it’s always good to read your experience).

My guest today is Nigel Jones who is making his third appearance on the Tribe Sober podcast – our conversations always get plenty of downloads and Nigel is a mine of valuable information!

In this episode:-

• Nigel’s secret to success was becoming a non-drinker from Day One — rather than a drinker trying to quit.
• He used the metaphor of a mountain — put yourself on top from the start rather than struggling to climb it.
• It's our beliefs and values shape our identity, then it’s our identity that drives our intentions and actions.
• We need to flip our beliefs: once we truly believe that alcohol is a poison, then everything changes.
• Nigel is a qualified Hypnotherapist and he came up with a great analogy to explain how hypnotherapy works
• Our conscious mind is often resistant and has “bouncers” to prevent new information from entering our subconscious
• Hypnotherapy can remove those bouncers allowing better access to the subconscious
• Drinking creates a program in our subconscious and hypnotherapy helps us to replace it with healthier programs.
• Nigel is also qualified in NLP - Neuro Linguistic Programming which can help us to rewire our beliefs
• We both agreed that Drinking is deeply tribal — Nigel calls the Alcohol Drinking Tribe the ADT
• People protect their ADT which is why we often encounter resistance when we announce that we have quit drinking
• When we leave the ADT, we need to find another tribe quickly so that we don’t feel isolated or judged
• In fact Connection is the opposite of addiction and
• That’s why we set up Tribe Sober which offers connection, vulnerability, and authenticity

– so if you’re ready to swop your drinking tribe for Tribe Sober then click here to check out our membership program

• Nigel shares his own inspiring story called Walking Back to Happiness
• He’s also a certified hypnotherapist, NLP practitioner and life coach.
• He offers 1:1 and group coaching, for habit change, phobias, and anxiety.

His website and social media is 9kmby9am.com

Nigel's previous podcast interviews with Tribe Sober are here and here

Episode Sponsor

This episode is sponsored by the Tribe Sober Membership Program. If you want to change your relationship with alcohol then sign up today - here is the link.

Help us to spread the word!

We made this podcast so that we can reach more people who need our help. Please subscribe and share.

We release a podcast episode every Saturday morning.

You can follow Tribe Sober on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

You can join our private Facebook group HERE

• PS: How to Leave a Rating/Review in Apple Podcasts (on an iOS Device)

  1. Open the Podcasts app. EASY.
  2. Choose “Search” from the bottom row of icons and enter the name of the show (e.g. Recover Like a Mother) into the search field.
  3. Select the show under Shows (not under Episodes).
  4. Scroll down past the first few episodes until you see Ratings & Reviews.
  5. Click Write a Review underneath the displayed reviews from other listeners. You’ll then have the option to rate the show on a 5-star scale and write a review (you can rate without writing too but it’s always good to read your experience).

Tribe Sober - Your guide to alcohol-free living!

After running Tribe Sober for 10 years and helping thousands of people to ditch the drink and embrace alcohol-free living I've learned a lot. My biggest insight has been that sharing our stories around our problems with alcohol is the most powerful way we can help others - that's why the heart of this new podcast will be recovery stories.

That's why I'm sharing my story and reading my Goodbye to Alcohol letter on this podcast.

I'm also sharing my top 5 benefits of my first decade of sobriety and explaining the recovery timeline - what to expect during your first year of sobriety

In this Episode

• Top 5 benefits from 10 years of sobriety
• Recovery timeline for first year of sobriety
• How I got hooked on the booze - and nearly drowned
• How I got breast cancer - and carried on drinking
• How a "walking, talking blackout" made me (finally) ditch the drink
• How Tribe Sober was born
• My Goodbye to Alcohol Letter

  Episode Sponsor

  This episode is sponsored by the Tribe Sober Membership Program. If you want to change your relationship with alcohol then sign up today - here is the link.

  Help us to spread the word!

  We made this podcast so that we can reach more people who need our help. Please subscribe and share.

  We release a podcast episode every Saturday morning.

  You can follow Tribe Sober on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

  You can join our private Facebook group HERE

This week I'm doing a solo episode on the science behind alcohol dependency which underlines the importance of taking a break.

If you'd like a copy of our free ebook which will help you to take a break then drop me a line at janet@tribesober.com

In this Episode

• In our 20's and 30's we tend to be social drinkers - then some of us start using alcohol to cope with stress or loneliness
• As we get into our 40's or 50's we discover that just how bad alcohol is for us - so we try to cut down or stop
• We discover that this is not so easy to do
• The harsh truth is that after 20 years of drinking we are almost certain to develop a dependency on alcohol
• When we drink we create an endorphin spike (the buzz) but our brain produces dynorphin to calm it down
• So we drink more to prolong the buzz but over time this means that we have to drink more and more to get the same result
• Three things are happening when we drink - we get an endorphin spike and a dopamine hit
• Apart from making you feel good dopamine is the "learning" molecule and will create triggers
• Eventually your brain will "pre-empt" the trigger and produce dynorphin
• This will make you feel low and you will need the drink, just to feel normal
• Eventually our bodies get so reliant on alcohol so alcohol that we don't produce dopamine naturally any more
• The result is that we will lose interest in everyday pleasures - the only thing we enjoy is the artificial boost we get from alcohol
• That's the definition of an alcoholic - let us help you get off the slippery slope

Episode Sponsor

This episode is sponsored by the Tribe Sober Membership Program. If you want to change your relationship with alcohol then sign up today - here is the link.

Help us to spread the word!

We made this podcast so that we can reach more people who need our help. Please subscribe and share.

We release a podcast episode every Saturday morning.

You can follow Tribe Sober on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

You can join our private Facebook group HERE

My guest is author Patti Clark who was born and raised in San Francisco during the 60’s and 70’s – a flower child who started drinking and using drugs at the tender age of 13

In this episode:-

• Patti started drinking and using drugs as a young teenager
• Her mother was an alcoholic and died when Patti was just 16.
• She was Academically successful despite the heavy drinking and drug use. Patti first got sober at the age of 30 – she attended AA and stayed sober for 13 years.
• She eventually left 12-step recovery thinking she could moderate
• The drinking ramped up again and she drank for another 13 years.
• Patti's red flags included hiding bottles, kids noticing her drinking.
• Patti got sober again in November 2014 and this time it stuck
• She rebuilt her sobriety using therapy, journaling and creativity.
• She eventually co-founded an NA meeting with a focus on emotional sobriety
• Journalling played a huge role in her recovery, helping her to access her inner feelings and creativity.
• We both agreed on the value of sitting in the void
• Although it can be boring and uncomfortable at first it allows space for growth, ideas, and new passions.
• Believes women relapse partly because traditional 12-step recovery doesn't fit women’s emotional needs.
• Relapse is often linked to lack of connection and trying to fill emotional voids.
• Three key messages from Patti:- a) Find your tribe — Emphasizes that connection and community is critical for recovery. b) Allow yourself to be uncomfortable in early sobriety — that discomfort will lead to growth c) Joy and purpose are central to lasting recovery — sobriety should feel like an upgrade, not a deprivation.
• Patti's Books a) This Way Up — about the search for self (includes journaling workbook). b) "Recovery Road Trip" — real conversations with women about relapse & recovery; includes a journaling guide.
• Books available via Amazon, Simon & Schuster, available on Kindle, and as an audiobook
• Patti welcomes emails from readers and loves hearing their stories. Her email is patticlarksemail@gmail.com More Info:

Our next BF program kicks off on 11th May You can sign up for Breaking Free here

• Episode Sponsor

  This episode is sponsored by the Tribe Sober Membership Program. If you want to change your relationship with alcohol then sign up today Read more about our program and subscribe HERE

  Help us to Spread the Word!

  We made this podcast so that we can reach more people who need our help. Please subscribe and share.

  If you enjoyed the podcast, then please leave us a 5-star review on Apple podcasts.

  Take a screenshot of your review, and DM it to Tribe Sober’s Instagram page – see PS below for instructions. We’ll send you something special to say thank you!

  We release a podcast episode every Saturday morning.

  You can follow Tribe Sober on Facebook, Twitter, TikTok and Instagram.

  You can join our private Facebook group HERE.

  PS: How to Leave a Rating/Review in Apple Podcasts (on an iOS Device)

  1. Open the Podcasts app. EASY.
  2. Choose “Search” from the bottom row of icons and enter the name of the show (e.g. Recover Like a Mother) into the search field.
  3. Select the show under Shows (not under Episodes).
  4. Scroll down past the first few episodes until you see Ratings & Reviews.
  5. Click Write a Review underneath the displayed reviews from other listeners. You’ll then have the option to rate the show on a 5-star scale and write a review (you can rate without writing too but it’s always good to read your experience).

On last weeks podcast I talked you through the Breaking Free course in detail so do have a listen if you missed it

I recently hosted a discussion on Zoom with four Breaking Free graduates which will give you a real insight into the results that people are getting…

You’ll hear from Grania and Helen who did the course last year and then you’ll hear from Lynne and Lori who have just completed the latest program…

On the podcast you'll hear the soundtrack from that discussion

So if you want to be sure of a place on the next BF program which kicks off on 11th May then please sign up today as places are filling up fast

You can sign up for Breaking Free here

• • More Info

  Tribe Sober membership – you can join up HERE.

  • To access our website, click HERE.
  • If you would like a free copy of our “Annual Tracker” or our e-book 66 Days to Sobriety, please email janet@tribesober.com.
  • If you would like to come to our Saturday afternoon Zoom Cafe as a guest and meet our community, just email janet@tribesober.com.

• Episode Sponsor

  This episode is sponsored by the Tribe Sober Membership Program. If you want to change your relationship with alcohol then sign up today Read more about our program and subscribe HERE

  Help us to Spread the Word!

  We made this podcast so that we can reach more people who need our help. Please subscribe and share.

  If you enjoyed the podcast, then please leave us a 5-star review on Apple podcasts.

  Take a screenshot of your review, and DM it to Tribe Sober’s Instagram page – see PS below for instructions. We’ll send you something special to say thank you!

  We release a podcast episode every Saturday morning.

  You can follow Tribe Sober on Facebook, Twitter, TikTok and Instagram.

  You can join our private Facebook group HERE.

  PS: How to Leave a Rating/Review in Apple Podcasts (on an iOS Device)

  1. Open the Podcasts app. EASY.
  2. Choose “Search” from the bottom row of icons and enter the name of the show (e.g. Recover Like a Mother) into the search field.
  3. Select the show under Shows (not under Episodes).
  4. Scroll down past the first few episodes until you see Ratings & Reviews.
  5. Click Write a Review underneath the displayed reviews from other listeners. You’ll then have the option to rate the show on a 5-star scale and write a review (you can rate without writing too but it’s always good to read your experience).