Are you ready to go deeper into the real reasons behind tokophobia?

In this honest and eye-opening episode, Alexia and JJ confront one of the most overlooked (and misunderstood) realities for those living with a fear of pregnancy and birth: the trauma of your own birth. Forget everything you’ve been told about where anxiety “comes from”— because this one starts sooner, and runs deeper, than most of us ever realise.

Whether you know your own birth story or not, this episode unpacks why the experience of being born is often the hidden driver behind lifelong tokophobia — shaping everything from mental health to relationships, even before our conscious memories form.

Key discussion points:

• Why the majority of tokophobia cases stem from trauma experienced during your birth — not just the trauma of giving birth as an adult

• JJ’s powerful recollection of learning her own birth story, and the long shadow it cast over her life, creativity, and pregnancy experiences

• Alexia’s personal process of healing birth trauma — without knowing the details of her own birth — and how it was a turning point in overcoming tokophobia

• Making sense of tokophobia symptoms: feeling trapped, out of control, fear of not being “ready”, and why they’re so often rooted in the original birth experience

• How birth trauma impacts not just pregnancy, but identity, relationships, and mental health far beyond childhood

• Breaking the silence: why therapists, health professionals, and all of us need to look beyond childhood to understand reproductive anxiety

• The urgent call to reframe how we talk about birth trauma — so we stop conflating the experience of “giving birth” with “being born”

• Tangible hope: how healing the root of your fear (even if you don’t know your story) can transform your outlook and open up choice

This episode is for you if:

• You’re struggling with an intense, sometimes inexplicable fear of pregnancy or childbirth — even if no one else seems to “get it”

• You’ve felt dismissed by professionals who only look at childhood or adult traumas, and never consider what happened when you were born

• You’re feeling stuck, trapped, or out of control — not just about pregnancy, but in other parts of your life too

• You want to better understand yourself, break long-standing anxiety patterns, or make peace with your reproductive future

• You’re seeking practical hope, real-life experience, and validation that you’re not broken — and there is a way forward

If you’re craving a gentle but fiercely honest look at trauma, healing, and the true origins of tokophobia, this episode is your signpost. Step inside. You are welcome here.

Want more depth?

Explore the white papers, “Fear Sells (But It Doesn’t Serve)” and “The Case for Reproductive Anxiety Disorder,” or check out the RAD Responsible™ initiative for trauma-aware insights and support.

Find resources and join the community at tiktokophobia.com.

In this powerful episode of Tik-Tokophobia, cohost JJ Stenhouse steps into the guest seat and shares her personal journey with tokophobia—the overwhelming fear of pregnancy and childbirth.

Only recognising her tokophobia at age 68, JJ reveals how this hidden anxiety wove itself through her life, shaping her relationships, creativity, and even her sense of self.

The conversation explores the life-altering impact of unrecognised reproductive trauma, the challenges of healing, and what truly shifts when you finally put a name to your fear.

Key discussion points:

• Recognising tokophobia late in life: JJ’s realisation, after years of baffling anxiety, that her challenges with relationships and creativity were rooted in early birth trauma and reproductive anxiety.

• How tokophobia shapes life choices: The impact of tokophobia on relationships, marriage, and the choice (or absence of choice) to have children.

• Creative stifling: Discovering that tokophobia didn’t just stop JJ from having children—it also blocked her ability to “birth” creative projects or bring her ideas into the world.

• The emotional experience of miscarriage: JJ’s experience of intense terror, denial, and then unexpected anger during an early miscarriage, and how this was misunderstood by others (and herself).

• Grieving what never happened: Reflections on how menopause can trigger a fresh wave of grief for those who never had children, even when the decision was never clear-cut.

• Medical dismissal and societal judgement: Revisiting the insensitive responses from medical professionals and the isolation of being childless by circumstance, not always choice.

• Healing and hope: JJ’s approach to overcoming her tokophobia—naming the fear, releasing stored trauma in the body, and seeing real, tangible shifts in her anxiety, creativity, and connection with children.

• The creative renaissance: How finally addressing tokophobia led to a surprising burst of creativity and a deeper sense of safety and connection.

• Practical healing insights: The power of simply naming the issue, the link between body-based anxiety and reproductive trauma, and the role of readiness in personal healing.

Who is this episode for?

This episode is for anyone living with unexplained anxiety around pregnancy, birth, or even creativity — especially if you feel “blocked” in life and can’t quite put your finger on why.

It’s for those struggling to process reproductive trauma, feeling unseen by medical or mental health professionals, or grieving what could have been.

If you suspect you might have tokophobia or reproductive anxiety, or you simply want to understand how deep these fears can run, JJ’s story will offer both insight and hope.

Whether you’re searching for answers, validation, or a way forward, this episode will show you that you’re absolutely not alone — and that healing is possible at any stage of life.

If this resonates, check out our white papers — “Fear Sells (But It Doesn’t Serve)” and “The Case for Reproductive Anxiety Disorder” — and explore our RAD Responsible™ resources for more on safe, empowering storytelling around pregnancy and birth.

If you’ve ever felt a deep dread of pregnancy, birth, or anything connected to babies—only to wonder if you’re broken or mad for feeling that way — this episode will feel like coming home.

This week, Alexia and JJ turn the spotlight directly onto the messy, often misunderstood intersection between tokophobia (the pathological fear of pregnancy and childbirth) and mental health.

Sharing candid stories from their own healing journeys, they pull apart the ways tokophobia is more than “just a phobia” — it’s often the linchpin disorder underlying chronic anxiety, depression, OCD, isolation, and the crushing feeling of being fundamentally “not like other women”.

They also offer real hope: once you name it, you can begin to claim your life back.

In this episode:

• Why tokophobia is rarely “just” about birth — it’s the mother of all anxiety disorders (yes, really) and can fuel decades of depression, anxiety, and self-doubt

• How Alexia and JJ each realised they had tokophobia — sometimes only decades after the damage was done

• The vicious cycle: medical dismissal, social isolation, and why talking about tokophobia still feels taboo

• Triggers everywhere: from pregnant bumps to baby talk at work — how daily life can feel like an emotional minefield for people with tokophobia

• Relief after miscarriage? Fear of holding a friend’s baby? The tangled web of “unacceptable feelings” that come with the condition — and why you’re not alone

• Why the mental health system mostly fails tokophobic women, and how not being believed actually makes things worse

• The life-changing power of finally having a name for what you’re experiencing (and finding your tribe)

• Small steps to healing: where to seek help, how to find validation, and why your story really does matter

Who is this episode for?

This episode is a lifeline for anyone silently struggling with the fear of pregnancy, birth, or motherhood — especially if you:

• Feel haunted by anxiety, dread, or panic around anything to do with babies, pregnancy, or childbirth

• Experience depression, OCD or emotional isolation that seems tangled up in your reproductive story — but can’t find support that actually understands the root cause

• Have lost friendships, avoided life milestones, or kept quiet from embarrassment or shame

• Are tired of being dismissed by doctors, family, or even therapists who simply don’t “get it”

• Want to know you’re not broken — and need practical hope for healing

You don’t have to suffer in silence. This episode will leave you feeling seen, reassured, and ready to take the next step — whether that’s finding support, naming your fear, or simply realising you aren’t the only one feeling like this.

For professionals, partners, and anyone supporting someone with intense birth anxiety, this episode is an eye-opener — don’t miss the insight on true compassion and what actually helps.

If this resonates, subscribe to Tik-Tokophobia. There’s a whole community here waiting for you.