When the longest relationship I never had ended (not a typo), someone said to me, “New chapter, new year.” That was so not helpful.

Good is not a feeling I’ve ever felt at the end of a relationship. Even when ending it was good for me.

I know you get it.

This week on the pod, we are talking about five things nobody tells you about starting over.

This episode is a shorty — 5 minutes. But it’s juicy!

P.S. Are you a regular listener? Leave a review. You’ll definitely rack of some karma credits for spreading the word. 😉

Mentioned in Episode 18:

🗣️ FREE Masterclass: Understanding Your Relationship Patterns

Date: January 23, 2025
Time: 1pm PST / 4pm EST

Your calendar might be full, but what's really keeping you unavailable?

In this week’s episode, we are talking about why many of us are more comfortable with exhaustion than connection.

🔎 I have a simple practice for you: The Spacious Minute. It might reveal what your busy schedule is protecting you from. No meditation required.

🗣️ FREE Masterclass: Understanding Your Relationship Patterns

Date: January 23, 2025
Time: 1pm PST / 4pm EST

We'll skip the self-help clichés and dive straight into why we repeat patterns even when we see them coming.

Can’t make it live? We've got you. Register anyway, and you'll receive the full package: recording, slides, transcripts, and audio.

P.S. Are you loving the podcast? Consider leaving a review. Big love for helping to spread the word.❤️

Mentioned in Episode 17:

FREE Masterclass: Understanding Your Relationship Patterns

Spacious Minute exercise: 60 seconds of intentional stillness. No need to fill up the space. No trying to relax. No breathing exercises. Just be —for one solid minute.

I spent years mistaking intensity for intimacy, choosing complicated over calm because at least I knew the steps to that dance. When someone consistently showed up—no games, no drama —it felt empty. But it wasn't about them. It was about how foreign safety felt to my nervous system.

In this week’s episode, we explore seven reasons why we sometimes distance ourselves from good love, heading straight for the familiar territory of "it's complicated."

Sometimes, the hardest part isn't finding good love – it's letting ourselves receive it.

Plus, exciting news about Sovereignty, my new program for women ready to move beyond understanding their patterns to actually changing them. Early bird pricing coming soon.

Mentioned in Episode 16:

Sovereignty. Four phases... one transformative journey.

Get on the waitlist: https://staceyherrera.com/sov-waitlist

The Five-Second Pause (exercise)

When you feel that familiar urge to create chaos or pull away from something good, pause for five seconds (one one-thousand, two one-thousand, etc.) - just notice what's happening in your body without trying to change it. The pause isn't about choosing differently; it's about creating enough space to notice that you have a choice.

I've been thinking about our desires—not fleeting wishes but longings that remind us there's more to life than comfortable compromises.

In Episode 15, we illuminate how many of us are caught in the familiar tension between gratitude for what is and hunger for what could be.

There's wisdom in wanting; maybe it's time to stop apologizing for wanting more.

P.S. If this episode resonates, you might want to check out Sovereignty—doors open next month. Get on the waitlist.

Mentioned in Episode 15:

Sovereignty. Four phases... one transformative journey.

Get on the waitlist: https://subscribe.staceyherrera.com/sovereignty-waitlist

We used just to know things. Remember that?

Before we started gathering a focus group of friends and consulting “The Google” at ridiculous hours to search for answers, we used to know things.

And by knowing things, I mean we used to trust ourselves.

This week, we’re discussing what happens when we trade that knowing for external validation.

I share my bookstore epiphany. Some of my biggest downloads have happened in bookstores —go figure.

Mentioned in Episode 14:

Sovereignty is coming soon - join the waitlist: https://subscribe.staceyherrera.com/sovereignty-waitlist

There is so much to be pissed about. Living in a world that often expects us to manage everyone's feelings while minimizing our own.

We’ve spent years trying not to coast on emotional autopilot. The exhaustion is real.

In episode 13, we’re taking a deeper look at anger. I’m digging into why that simmering frustration is not a sign of bitterness —it’s proof that it’s time to make shift happen.

We’re done apologizing for our feelings. Now is the time to begin trusting our inner knowing.

Ready? Let’s go.

Mentioned in Episode 13:

The patterns that protected you have served their purpose - it's time to choose what's next. Sovereignty is coming soon - join the waitlist: https://subscribe.staceyherrera.com/sovereignty-waitlist

I thought I was good at love.

I prided myself on being patient and understanding —a shoulder to cry on. I consistently chose partners who couldn’t (or wouldn’t) show up for me. Not that I required them to.

That changed the day I learned my longtime lover had jumped the broom. Oh, and I found out he was married on Facebook, by the way.

Turns out I wasn’t as good at relationships as I thought. But I was good at staying safe.

In this week's episode, we’re talking about what happens when our patterns come into sharp focus. And how those patterns can show up in the body.

Sometimes, pain is the wake-up call.

Mentioned in Episode 12:

The Body Keeps the Score by Dr. Bessel van der Kolk

From mysterious anxiety to unexplained tension, our bodies speak a language we've forgotten how to hear.

This week, we're exploring the quiet wisdom in our bones.

If you’ve ever made a decision that seemed right but felt wrong, this episode is for you. Does your gut know things that your mind won’t admit? This is for you, too.

Sometimes, the answers aren't between our ears. Maybe they’re hitched sin our breath, beneath the blades of our shoulders, or resting in the curve of our back.

The body cannot lie. Let's remember how to listen.

Mentioned in Episode 11:

The Body Keeps the Score by Dr. Bessel van der Kolk