Cat thought she was just about managing. The undiagnosed ADHD, the mental load, the drinking. Cat wasn’t drinking in the mornings, she hadn’t lost her job or her kids, so how could she be an alcoholic? But the truth is, the mental gymnastics of planning every drink, hiding the chaos, and pretending to cope led to complete burnout. In this incredible conversation, Cat Sims sits down with me to share the stark truth behind the mask – the trauma, the shame, the moment everything collapsed, and the surprising reasons why she wouldn’t change any of it. Rock bottom is rarely a a single event. This conversation is a layered, painful, and ultimately powerful journey into honesty, acceptance and recovery.

Cat opens up about the mental load of motherhood and how the pressure to be perfect masked years of silent suffering. We talk about postnatal depression, the seductive role alcohol played in survival, and the personal cost of avoiding vulnerability. She shares the story of a blackout that led to assault, how she stayed in active addiction for years after, and why she finally made the choice to stop. We explore sobriety not just as abstinence but as a spiritual and psychological boundary – a way of keeping the doors locked in a world that isn’t always safe. We break down the stigma of the word 'alcoholic', why being powerless gives you power, food and phone addiction and why alcoholism isn't about alcohol.

If you’ve ever questioned your relationship with alcohol, felt trapped by perfectionism, or carried the weight of doing everything for everyone, this conversation will speak directly to you. Cat’s honesty is refreshing, very often funny, and deeply moving. Her new book, The Mental Load Diaries, is out now and comes from a place of lived experience, not theory.

Buy her brilliant new book here!

https://notsosmugnow.komi.io

More on Cat -

Cat sims is a content creator, podcaster and author who is still trying to figure the whole ‘adulting’ thing out.

She’s made a living out of documenting her failures and successes as a 40 year old woman, a mother and a wife across various social media platforms.

Her mission in life is to make as many women as possible feel ‘seen’ and to make them realise that they are never, ever, ‘the only one.’ She’s honest, wonderfully self-deprecating and willing to say all the things the rest of us hide away and, in doing so, managed to make us all feel a little bit better about our perfectly messy lives. Cat is author of the new book THE MENTAL LOAD DIARIES and is nearly 4 years sober. Huge thanks Cat!

Oliver is an ambassador for Alcohol Change UK and you can access support here - https://tinyurl.com/5dt5773e

Thank you to Gavin Sisters for sponsoring this episode! Visit -

www.gavinsisters.co.uk

and use promo code SCHOOLOFROCKBOTTOM for 10% off! Support the pod here!

https://buymeacoffee.com/olivermason1

Topics -

0:00 Intro

4:00 Cat's rock bottom

7:30 Is rock bottom one singular moment?

9:30 Post-natal depression & burnout

14:00 The fetishization of motherhood & managing relationships

20:00 How alcohol and drugs helped and hurt 'the mental load'

24:00 Pick up 1 drink and then...?

25:30 Acceptance of darker sides to yourself

26:40 Let's talk relapse

29:00 The effects of undiagnosed ADHD

34:15 ADHD and addiction

36:20 Food addiction

38:45 Where are you getting your dopamine?

41:00 Sponsor

42:00 Why use the word ALCOHOLIC?

44:30 What do you say at the bar?

45:30 What does an alcoholic look like?

47:45 Why I wouldn't "cure" my alcoholism & relapse

50:00 Why I'm an alcoholic

51:15 Why powerless means power

52:25 Alcoholism isn't about alcohol

53:30 The phone & social media

55:30 ADHD energy helps me be creative

57:00 Why do people go back out?

58:50 What do you want written on your gravestone?

Follow Cat

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/notsosmugnow

WATCH ON YOUTUBE - https://tinyurl.com/3zt4peww

LISTEN ON APPLE - https://tinyurl.com/y3n2chk3

#SobrietyJourney

#MentalLoad

#ADHDAndAddiction