Divorce doesn't have to be a battlefield where only the strongest survive. Yet many people approach it with exactly this mindset, fueled by persistent myths about what the family court system can and will do for them.

In this candid conversation, we three divorce experts cut through the misconceptions that lead so many people toward an unnecessarily destructive and expensive processes. We tackle the painful truth that fault attribution has virtually no impact in our no-fault divorce system, despite many clients' desperate need to have their "day in court" to tell their story of marital anguish.

We explore the sobering reality of judicial discretion—how judges are human beings with unconscious biases who must make decisions based on limited information presented in court. When you hand your most important family decisions to a stranger in a black robe, you're gambling with outcomes that affect you and your children for years to come.

The financial toll of adversarial divorce receives special attention as we contrast the initial retainer promises with the eventual six-figure realities many litigants face. The most damaging myth we address might be the belief that hiring an aggressive "gladiator" attorney will somehow produce better results, when experience shows they just make it take longer.

Through real examples and decades of professional wisdom, we make the case for mediation and collaborative divorce as processes that not only cost less financially but also preserve the relationships that matter—especially when children are involved. While no divorce process is entirely painless or inexpensive, understanding these realities can help you make choices that support your long-term well-being rather than satisfying short-term desires for vindication.

Ready to approach your divorce with clear eyes and realistic expectations? Listen now to arm yourself with the truth about what really works in family transitions.

The Three Wisemen of Divorce are divorce experts Mark C. Hill, CFP®, CDFA®, Financial Divorce Consultant; Peter Roussos, MA, MFT, CST, psychotherapist; and Shawn Weber, CLS-F*, Family Law Mediator and Divorce Attorney.

Our exploration of fault versus no-fault divorce reveals surprising historical twists and powerful stakes for modern families. Did you know Ronald Reagan—yes, that Ronald Reagan—signed America's first no-fault divorce law? Before that watershed moment, couples resorted to hiring private detectives and staging hotel room encounters just to escape unhappy marriages.

Today, conservative voices like JD Vance advocate returning to fault-based divorce, arguing no-fault made ending marriages too easy. But what's really behind this push? As we unpack the complex history of divorce law reform, we explore whether making divorce harder actually creates healthier marriages or simply traps people in unhappy ones.

The conversation takes fascinating turns through domestic violence statutes, covenant marriages, and the concerning trend of weaponizing abuse allegations for financial advantage. We consider thought-provoking questions: Does fault-based divorce protect families or amplify conflict? How does assigning blame affect children caught in the middle? And ultimately, shouldn't we focus on creating healthy marriages rather than simply preventing their dissolution?

Our candid discussion reveals how divorce laws reflect deeper cultural values about gender, family, and personal freedom. Whether you're navigating your own relationship challenges or simply interested in how policy shapes our most intimate decisions, this episode offers valuable perspective on what genuinely helps families thrive rather than merely stay together.

Share your thoughts with us on this controversial topic! We're genuinely interested in hearing different perspectives as we continue exploring the complex intersection of money, psychology, and law in divorce.

The Three Wisemen of Divorce are divorce experts Mark C. Hill, CFP®, CDFA®, Financial Divorce Consultant; Peter Roussos, MA, MFT, CST, psychotherapist; and Shawn Weber, CLS-F*, Family Law Mediator and Divorce Attorney.

Divorce unfolds in two parallel universes: the cold, mechanical world of legal proceedings and the raw, messy landscape of human emotions. When these worlds collide, many discover that what matters most to them personally holds little to no relevance in court. This disconnect can leave people feeling unheard and unable to move forward.

We dive deep into the concept of "legally irrelevant" issues that carry enormous emotional weight—betrayal from affairs, resentment over financial power imbalances, religious conflicts about raising children, and the unspoken promises broken through divorce. These emotionally charged issues may not sway a judge, but they absolutely impact people's willingness to negotiate and their ability to co-parent effectively after divorce.

Through real-world examples from our decades of combined experience, we explore how alternative approaches like mediation and collaborative divorce create sacred space for necessary emotional processing. We share strategies for reframing painful conversations, acknowledging hurt without assigning blame, and shifting focus from past grievances to future relationships—especially when children are involved.

The conversation takes a powerful turn when we discuss how parents "write the divorce story their children will tell." By defining personal mission statements and values early in the process, divorcing couples create foundations that support them through difficult conversations and set the stage for healthier post-divorce family dynamics.

Whether you're contemplating divorce, in the middle of one, or supporting someone who is, this episode offers wisdom about addressing the human side of legal separation. The law may be an imperfect tool for healing emotional wounds, but with the right approach, you can honor both the legal and emotional aspects of divorce.

What emotional issues are you struggling with that might seem "irrelevant" to the legal process? We'd love to hear your thoughts and questions.

The Three Wisemen of Divorce are divorce experts Mark C. Hill, CFP®, CDFA®, Financial Divorce Consultant; Peter Roussos, MA, MFT, CST, psychotherapist; and Shawn Weber, CLS-F*, Family Law Mediator and Divorce Attorney.

Curious about navigating the complexities of high-conflict divorce with more grace and empathy? Discover the transformative power of mediation and Collaborative Practice with our esteemed guest, Charmaine Panko, a seasoned lawyer, mediator and Collaborative practitioner from Saskatoon, Saskatchewan. Together, we unpack the challenges of navigating divorce with a high-conflict personality.

Journey with us as we explore the "divorce escalator" metaphor and how traditional adversarial court systems can heighten tensions instead of resolving them. Personal anecdotes and professional insights reveal the limitations of current legal frameworks in addressing the psychological and financial needs of families in turmoil. We champion a shift towards a more collaborative, problem-solving approach in legal education, aiming for a system that supports long-term planning and mutual understanding over win-lose battles.

Engage with us in a conversation about the benefits of interest-based negotiations, which focus on shared values rather than adversarial tactics. We highlight the critical importance of trust-building, especially in co-parenting scenarios, and how mediation can offer hope for high-conflict personalities.

© 2025 Weber Dispute Resolution. All rights reserved.

The Three Wisemen of Divorce are divorce experts Mark C. Hill, CFP®, CDFA®, Financial Divorce Consultant; Peter Roussos, MA, MFT, CST, psychotherapist; and Shawn Weber, CLS-F*, Family Law Mediator and Divorce Attorney.

In this Presidential Election season, polarization is tearing us apart, but could it also hold the key to understanding and strengthening personal relationships? As the Three Wisemen of Divorce guide us through the charged political landscape of 2024, we uncover how deeply entrenched views can unravel marriages and complicate co-parenting. Through real-life cases, we examine how disagreements over finances and medical care can ignite conflicts, emphasizing that respect for differing opinions often proves more crucial than fiscal harmony.

Our exploration takes a discerning look at divorce and co-parenting, particularly when it comes to differences of opinion over morality, politics or even health care.

The conversation extends to the broader societal divides that color our relationships, whether ideological, religious, or lifestyle-based. By acknowledging the role of mediators and therapists in navigating these treacherous waters in family law and divorce matters, we recognize the value of staying neutral while remaining engaged. Through humor and cultural analogies, the complexities of maintaining respect amidst disagreements become evident.

The Three Wisemen of Divorce are divorce experts Mark C. Hill, CFP®, CDFA®, Financial Divorce Consultant; Peter Roussos, MA, MFT, CST, psychotherapist; and Shawn Weber, CLS-F*, Family Law Mediator and Divorce Attorney.

Unlock the secrets to effective communication in divorce mediation and transform misunderstandings into mutual understanding. Have you ever wondered why a simple desire, like being a "50-50 dad," can spiral into conflict? We promise to equip you with the tools to navigate these emotional landmines, spotlighting the imperative role of clear intentions and assumptions that can escalate tensions. Our episode sheds light on how professionals diligently maintain neutrality, ensuring both parties in a divorce feel heard and understood, despite the emotional reactivity that often pervades the process.

Through real-life scenarios and expert insights, we dissect the art of distinguishing between complaints and character attacks, guiding you toward more productive conversations. Discover how mediators can transform conflict into cooperation by clarifying complaints and avoiding the triggers of defensive responses. As we explore the intricate dance of mediation strategies, we emphasize persistence and the nuanced understanding of underlying issues. From financial settlements to property division, see how personal desires can overshadow objective considerations and learn how mediators, alongside mental health professionals, help clients articulate hidden needs, paving the way for empathetic, effective resolutions.

The Three Wisemen of Divorce are divorce experts Mark C. Hill, CFP®, CDFA®, Financial Divorce Consultant; Peter Roussos, MA, MFT, CST, psychotherapist; and Shawn Weber, CLS-F*, Family Law Mediator and Divorce Attorney.

What if you could transform anger into a tool for growth and understanding? We bring you a thought-provoking conversation with Dr. James Walton, Ph.D., a licensed family therapist and Eureka Award recipient. Together, we explore the intricate dynamics of anger during divorce and offer practical strategies for managing these intense emotions. Learn how to separate feeling angry from outward expressions of anger and why making conscious choices about our reactions is vital for healthy communication.

Sit down with us as we unpack techniques to handle difficult conversations with grace, especially when emotions run high. Ever wondered how to stay calm and collected? Discover the power of pausing conversations, modeling calm behavior, and reframing complaints into constructive proposals. Dr. Walton shares invaluable insights on how feeling heard and validated can significantly reduce anger. Additionally, we delve into the importance of creating a mission statement to guide respectful interactions, both in personal and professional settings.

But that's not all! Our conversation takes a deeper turn as we discuss managing conflicts during meetings, employing "I" statements, and the role of curiosity in resolving disputes. Dr. Walton offers wisdom on understanding the underlying emotions masked by anger, such as fear or shame, and how family history impacts relationship dynamics. We also highlight the importance of professional dispute resolvers and the benefits of restorative practices. Whether you're navigating divorce or just seeking better ways to communicate, this episode is packed with actionable advice and heartfelt stories to help you foster healthier, more constructive relationships.

Here's a shout-out to Feedspot, who recognized The Three Wisemen of Divorce as one of California's top law podcasts!

The Three Wisemen of Divorce are divorce experts Mark C. Hill, CFP®, CDFA®, Financial Divorce Consultant; Peter Roussos, MA, MFT, CST, psychotherapist; and Shawn Weber, CLS-F*, Family Law Mediator and Divorce Attorney.

Ever wondered why untangling the knot of marriage can feel like braving a labyrinth? In a truth-telling session with financial divorce consultant Mark Hill, therapist Pete Roussos, and attorney Shawn Weber, we uncover the multifaceted journey through divorce. Starting with a chuckle, we quickly delve into the sobering realities couples face as they divide their lives, emphasizing the pivotal role of understanding both the tangible assets and the intangible emotional investments involved.

Navigating a divorce can feel like steering through a storm, with the potential to either reach safe harbor swiftly or get mired in tempestuous disputes. Our experts dissect the emotional echoes of marriage that reverberate through the legal process, illustrating with tales of lightning-fast settlements and agonizing multi-year battles. The conversation is an eye-opener to the significance of emotional intelligence and the strategies that can help avoid the quicksand of acrimony, framing a realistic picture of what closure might truly entail.

Lastly, we stitch together the wisdom of our Three Wisemen of Divorce to craft an arsenal of negotiation strategies that balance heart and wallet. This episode isn't just about the end of a marriage; it's a guide to the beginning of a future—with the clarity and support to make it a healthier, wealthier one. Join us for an intimate exploration of the intersection between the ledger and the heart in the landscape of divorce.

The Three Wisemen of Divorce are divorce experts Mark C. Hill, CFP®, CDFA®, Financial Divorce Consultant; Peter Roussos, MA, MFT, CST, psychotherapist; and Shawn Weber, CLS-F*, Family Law Mediator and Divorce Attorney.