“All I’ve done is I’ve tried to take past experiences of pain that I’ve learned from and pour them in the other men who I’ve come to terms with.”

Strength isn’t about domination—it’s about discipline, self-respect, and responsibility. The real work of becoming a man today begins with facing your demons, taking full ownership of your life, and learning to protect and provide for those you love. Masculinity, at its core, is not toxic. It’s essential. But to embody it, you’ve got to be fit—mentally, emotionally, and physically—and be ready to bet everything on yourself.

In this episode, you’ll hear how pain can be turned into purpose. You’ll learn how to build your “life resume,” why failure is the stepping stone to success, and how daily discomfort sharpens a man’s spirit. From fatherhood to faith, team building to trauma, the message is clear: your growth starts when your excuses end.

Ray “Cash” Care is a former Navy SEAL and CIA contractor turned entrepreneur, speaker, and men’s coach. He’s built his mission around forging savage servants—strong, disciplined, vulnerable men who lead from the front.

Learn more & connect:

Also in this episode:

Books Mentioned

Emotional Intelligence 2.0

Author: Travis Bradberry & Jean Greaves

https://www.amazon.com/Emotional-Intelligence-2-0-Travis-Bradberry/dp/0974320625

The Missing Secret of the Legendary Book Think and Grow Rich

Author: John Mitchell

https://thinkitbeit.com/

You’re invited to come to a Sovereign Circle meeting to experience it for yourself. To learn more, go to https://www.sovereignman.ca/. While you’re there, check out the Battle Ready program and check out the store for Sovereign Man t-shirts, hats, and books.

“Modern medicine is great for keeping you alive, but they can’t teach you how to live well.”

In a culture that prizes hustle and stoicism, many men are burning out by treating their bodies like machines. This episode explores how true strength means aligning with your biology—not overriding it. Health is foundational to masculinity, not a side quest. You don’t need two hours in the gym or 30 supplements a day. You need movement, quality food, and enough self-awareness to admit you can’t do it all alone. Vitality isn’t a luxury—it’s the launchpad for fatherhood, leadership, and purpose.

Hardy shares how a ruptured appendix and a year of poor recovery led him to obsess over human health. From navigating digestive issues to learning how modern environments suppress testosterone, Bryan breaks down why men feel tired, inflamed, and disconnected—and how to turn it around. His insights on stress, hormones, and masculinity are rooted in real-world case studies, not influencer fantasies.

Bryan Hardy is a certified holistic nutritionist and performance coach. He helps high-performing men rebuild their energy, optimize gut health, and live with purpose through his signature “Vital Man Method.” He’s the founder of RevitalizedMan.com and offers practical tools for modern men who want more strength with less stress.

Learn more & connect:

Go to https://revitalizedman.com/ to learn more.

And go to https://revitalizedman.com/nicky to complete the free testosterone optimization cheat sheet.

You’re invited to come to a Sovereign Circle meeting to experience it for yourself. To learn more, go to https://www.sovereignman.ca/. While you’re there, check out the Battle Ready program and check out the store for Sovereign Man t-shirts, hats, and books.

“When you say I am anything, you’re basically tying something in with your identity. It’s who you are as a person.”

Many men today are drifting—busy but aimless, productive yet unfulfilled. This conversation explores the idea that without a mission, a man is merely passing time. A man’s sense of identity must be tied to something deeper than just his job or routine; it must be anchored in purpose. When a man claims his mission and fuses it with his identity, he no longer lives for weekends or approval. He lives for something that lights him up and draws others to him. Purpose, not comfort, is the compass.

Paul Bauer speaks candidly about rebuilding his life after hardship and channeling that transformation into a platform to help other men. He emphasizes the need for men to seek meaningful discomfort, reconnect to their hunger, and create a brand that stems from real conviction. His story illustrates how aligning your brand, purpose, and passion can make you magnetic and fulfilled—even if it means sticking your knee in a bucket of ice every morning.

Paul Bauer is a certified life coach and NLP practitioner best known as the host of the Come On Man podcast. Specializing in attraction dynamics and masculine self-improvement, Paul guides men through the chaos of modern relationships and back into leadership roles within their lives.

Learn more & connect:

Come On Man Podcast – Hosted by Paul Bauer

https://comeonmanpod.com/

No More Mr. Nice Guy by Dr. Robert Glover: https://www.drglover.com/no-more-mr-nice-guy.html

Bob Proctor – A mentor known for purpose and success.

https://www.proctorgallagherinstitute.com/programs/you-were-born-rich

Choice Theory by William Glasser

https://www.amazon.com/Choice-Theory-Psychology-Personal-Freedom/dp/0060930144

You’re invited to come to a Sovereign Circle meeting to experience it for yourself. To learn more, go to https://www.sovereignman.ca/. While you’re there, check out the Battle Ready program and check out the store for Sovereign Man t-shirts, hats, and books.

“A man without a purpose is just spending time.” - A. Justin Sterling

Today we’re talking about masculinity, brotherhood, and the kind of personal growth that actually holds up in the real world. At the center of it all is the late Justin Sterling, founder of the Sterling Institute of Relationship, who passed away recently. His work changed a lot of men’s lives.

Justin Sterling launched the Institute out of Oakland, California in 1979. His core idea was this: men and women are not the same. Not biologically or emotionally. He believed that by understanding and respecting these differences, people could create better relationships.

His biggest contribution was the Sterling Men’s Weekend. Two and a half days, stripped of fluff, where men get a chance to confront themselves—who they are, what they’ve settled for, and what kind of life they really want to build. It’s not therapy. It’s not a motivational seminar. It’s a crucible and it works.

In remembrance of Justin Sterling we've searched our episode archives for guests who’ve attended the Sterling Men’s Weekend. Our host, Nicky Billou, himself a graduate of the program.

Episode Highlights:

1. Masculinity is Simpler Than You Think

Guest: Huub van Maris

2. The Importance of Brotherhood in Modern Masculinity

Guest: Geoff Tomlinson

3. Creating Personal Context and Taking Ownership

Guest: Steve Richmond

4. The Role of Brotherhood in Personal Transformation

Guest: Rob Arpa

Learn more:

• Sterling Institute of Relationship

• What Really Works with Men by A. Justin Sterling

You’re invited to come to a Sovereign Circle meeting to experience it for yourself. To learn more, go to https://www.sovereignman.ca/. While you’re there, check out the Battle Ready program and check out the store for Sovereign Man t-shirts, hats, and books.

“Forces that are destructive to the family. And I do look at them with a critical eye and a lot of those things need to be reformed. But I also think in parallel with that, there’s a growing recognition of the individual within.”

For many men, the second half of life brings an unexpected reckoning. Divorce, career changes, or personal loss force a decision: stay stuck in old patterns or take charge of a new future. Reinvention isn’t about reclaiming the past—it’s about stepping into your fullest potential. Thriving in this next chapter requires resilience, self-examination, and the right brotherhood to push you forward.

Michael Osterling has guided countless men through life’s toughest transitions. With decades of experience as a therapist and coach, he helps men rebuild their identity by strengthening their body, mind, and emotional resilience. He believes in the power of masculine-only spaces where men can challenge each other and grow.

With nearly 30 years as a therapist and 25 years as a coach, Michael has worked with elite military leaders and now co-runs Resilience Optimized, helping men reclaim their strength and purpose.

Resilience Optimized: https://www.resilienceoptimized.com/

Movenet: https://www.movnat.com/

SealFit: https://sealfit.com/

Also mentioned:

John Taylor Gatto

Fudōshin

Fudōshin is a state of equanimity or imperturbability. It is a philosophical or mental dimension to Japanese martial arts which contributes to the effectiveness of the advanced practitioner. Fudō Myōō is found in Shingon Buddhism as a guardian deity, who is portrayed as carrying a sword in his right hand and a rope in his left.

You’re invited to come to a Sovereign Circle meeting to experience it for yourself. To learn more, go to https://www.sovereignman.ca/. While you’re there, check out the Battle Ready program and check out the store for Sovereign Man t-shirts, hats, and books.

“I think any man out there that’s living out there that might be younger than the age of 30, I don’t think they’ve really felt the brutality of what it takes to survive in the world, right? And the world is not a nice place, as much as we all like to tell each other.”

Mental toughness isn’t something you’re born with—it’s something you build, brick by brutal brick. It’s about embracing discomfort, pushing past self-imposed limits, and refusing to be the guy who folds under pressure. The difference between success and failure? Discipline, resilience, and a willingness to go all in when others tap out. Whether it’s in business, fitness, or life, the men who win are the ones who don’t just endure hardship—they seek it out, because they know that steel is forged in fire.

Rob Arpa and Nicky Billou dive into the importance of fortifying the mind through physical challenge, discipline, and the right social circles. They discuss the teachings of elite athletes like David Goggins, the necessity of surrounding yourself with high-achievers, and why most men settle for mediocrity when they should be striving for dominance. Their message is clear: if you’re not actively strengthening your body and mind, you’re getting weaker.

Rob Arpa is a seasoned entrepreneur. With a background in business and a relentless drive for self-improvement, he’s built a seven-figure company while continually pushing his own limits. His insights into mindset, resilience, and success come from firsthand experience, making him a voice men should listen to—if they’re serious about stepping up their game.

Also in this episode:

“Never Finished” by David Goggins

https://davidgoggins.com/book/

“Can’t Hurt Me” by David Goggins

https://a.co/d/cQ4CDRX

“Finish Line Thinking: How to Think and Win Like a Champion” by Nicky Billou

https://a.co/d/hjA2G5S

“Extreme Ownership” by Jocko Willink

https://a.co/d/iVVdqWh

“Think and Grow Rich” by Napoleon Hill

https://a.co/d/gR1VwTK

“The Missing Secret” by Joe Vitale

https://a.co/d/8TiuQ9J

You’re invited to come to a Sovereign Circle meeting to experience it for yourself. To learn more, go to https://www.sovereignman.ca/. While you’re there, check out the Battle Ready program and check out the store for Sovereign Man t-shirts, hats, and books.

“You can be anything to a woman, but you can’t be boring.”

The hard truth? Attraction dies when a man trades his edge for comfort, his decisiveness for “whatever you want, babe,” and his self-respect for a never-ending to-do list. Women don’t fall for a guy because he’s nice; they fall for a guy who makes their heart race, who leads with confidence, and who—let’s be honest—knows how to keep things interesting. Lose that, and you’re not in a relationship—you’re in a slow-moving hostage situation.

Our guest breaks down why so many men go from exciting to invisible in their own relationships. He shares war stories, laugh-out-loud failures, and the hard-earned lessons that turned it all around. The secret sauce? Stop asking permission, start leading, and remember: attraction isn’t a faucet you turn on when you’re in the mood—it’s a dynamic you maintain every single day.

Paul Bauer is a men’s coach, author, and podcast host who learned the rules of attraction the hard way—by breaking every single one of them. After years of trial, error, and some truly questionable dating decisions, he dedicated himself to understanding what makes relationships work. Now, he helps men reclaim their confidence, maintain their edge, and, most importantly, avoid becoming the human equivalent of background noise in their own love lives.

Learn more & connect:

Come on, Man podcast on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@ComeOnManPodcast

Books:

1. The Rational Male by Rollo Tomassi
   https://www.amazon.com/Rational-Male-Rollo-Tomassi/dp/1492777862
2. No More Mr. Nice Guy by Dr. Robert Glover
   https://www.amazon.com/No-More-Mr-Nice-Guy/dp/0762415339
3. The Player’s Handbook by Rollo Tomassi
   https://www.amazon.com/Players-Handbook-Rational-Male/dp/1801440402
4. Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill
   https://www.amazon.com/Think-Grow-Rich-Landmark-Bestseller/dp/1585424331
5. Atomic Attraction by Christopher Canwell
   https://www.amazon.com/Atomic-Attraction-Psychology-Mastery-Dating/dp/1953616012
6. Married Man Sex Life Primer 2011 by Athol Kay
   https://www.amazon.com/Married-Man-Life-Primer-2011/dp/1460981731
7. The Essential Skills of a Masculine Presence Psychology Paradigm
   https://a.co/d/4D1djp0

You’re invited to come to a Sovereign Circle meeting to experience it for yourself. To learn more, go to https://www.sovereignman.ca/. While you’re there, check out the Battle Ready program and check out the store for Sovereign Man t-shirts, hats, and books.

“Men kind of get complacent. They think they’ve reached this, you know, sort of finish line. Like they don’t have to try anymore. And things just go into complacency and they stop being the type of attractive guys that inspire that reaction from their wives.”

A thriving relationship is built on more than just commitment—it requires polarity, confidence, and a refusal to slip into complacency. Too many men think the work ends at marriage, but that’s where leadership truly begins. Attraction fades when men stop leading, stop being assertive, and start playing it safe. The key is simple: become the kind of man your wife wants to chase. That means prioritizing self-improvement, standing firm in your boundaries, and bringing an energy that keeps the fire alive.

Paul Bauer has spent years helping men reclaim the respect, admiration, and desire they once had in their marriages. He emphasizes that a loss of intimacy isn’t a scheduling issue—it’s a reflection of lost attraction. When men step up as leaders in their relationships, everything changes. Women respond to confidence, direction, and a sense of adventure. The moment a man reclaims his role, the dynamic shifts from obligation to enthusiasm.

Paul Bauer is a men’s coach and author of Get Her to F** You Again: A Red Pill Guide to Fix a Dead Bedroom.* After experiencing his own struggles in marriage and relationships, Paul dedicated himself to understanding the psychology of attraction and leadership. His mission is to help men restore passion in their relationships and become the kind of men who naturally inspire desire. Find him at call.fixedeadbedrooms.com.

Learn more & connect:

1. Paul Bauer’s Coaching Calendar: https://call.fixedeadbedrooms.com
2. Paul’s latest book: The Essential Skills of a Masculine Presence | Psychology – Paradigm: Mastering Paradigms: Reprogram Your Mind for a Dominant Masculine Presence and Unleash Your Full Potential

https://a.co/d/cEeSAuO

1. Paul previous book: Get Her to F** You Again: A Red Pill Guide to Fix a Dead Bedroom

https://a.co/d/hcbE1aI

1. RP Thor’s Book: A Dominant Masculine Presence: Learning How To Cultivate Your Authentic Self As A Man And Display Supreme Confidence And Control Over How You Are Perceived

https://a.co/d/1MlT07V

You’re invited to come to a Sovereign Circle meeting to experience it for yourself. To learn more, go to https://www.sovereignman.ca/. While you’re there, check out the Battle Ready program and check out the store for Sovereign Man t-shirts, hats, and books.