#130. Not all losses are bereavements. Sometimes they follow a diagnosis and impact someone for the rest of their life, like with our guest in this episode.

This is The Silent Why, a podcast on a mission to explore grief, asking if hope can be found in 101 different types of permanent loss.

Loss #63 of 101: Loss through chronic illness - Lupus

In this episode, we meet Olivia Abousaid - a grief coach based in Los Angeles who lives with the autoimmune disease Lupus. Olivia shares the lesser-seen grief that comes with chronic illness - losses that don’t always get named or acknowledged.

We explore the impact of Lupus on daily life and identity, the challenging task of letting go of independence and learning to ask for help, navigating invisible grief as both a coach and a patient, the mental weight of “shoulds” and societal expectations, and finding agency and hope amidst physical limitations.

From missing out on sunny afternoons with friends to facing the fatigue that alters routines and dreams, Olivia’s story speaks to anyone who has experienced loss through ill health, medical diagnosis, or an unexpected change in life’s trajectory.

This is a powerful conversation about learning to grieve what’s gone, while choosing to hope in what remains.

To find out more about Olivia, visit: www.pact-coaching.com

www.instagram.com/pact_coaching

https://linktr.ee/pactcoaching

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How to talk to the grieving: thesilentwhy.com/post/howtotalktothegrieving

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Episode transcripts: thesilentwhy.buzzsprout.com

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#129. What are the most valuable things we've learnt - or think really matter - after 20 years of marriage?

This is The Silent Why, a podcast on a mission to open up conversations around grief, exploring asking if hope can be found in 101 different types of permanent loss.

On 26 May 2025, we celebrated 20 years of marriage! It's a big deal for us as we love being married and find we don't have that much to celebrate in life! So we decided to sit down and discuss what we've learnt over the past two decades, and share what we believe have been the most important ingredients in keeping our marriage as healthy and strong as possible.

And since we host a podcast, we thought 'why not record it for you to hear too?'

So that's exactly what we did. No editing (just the music and usual polish), a Sunday afternoon chat - published on Monday night.

In the build-up, we each wrote down our top five things we think have made the biggest difference in our relationship, but we didn’t share them with each other in advance. Were there overlaps? Surprises? Disagreements? You'll have to listen to find out!

If you’d like to hear more about us, especially our story around infertility and childlessness, you can hear us open up in a similar way in Loss 3: Loss of Fertility - https://www.thesilentwhy.com/podcast/episode/492a29c1/loss-3101-loss-of-fertility-chris-and-claire-sandys-part-1

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thesilentwhy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter | LinkedIn

What's a Herman? / Buy a Herman - thehermancompany.com

Support the show: buymeacoffee.com/thesilentwhy

Sign-up to my mailing list (only used for sharing news occasionally!): thesilentwhy.com/newsletter

How to talk to the grieving: thesilentwhy.com/post/howtotalktothegrieving

Review the show: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Goodpods

Episode transcripts: thesilentwhy.buzzsprout.com

Thank you for listening.

#128. Did you know you can build mental muscles, as well as physical ones? And that you can start that any time - no matter how weak you might feel?

Welcome to another My Why from Claire Sandys (co-host of The Silent Why podcast). My Why episodes are audio versions of my latest blog post.

If you'd prefer to read it, you can find it here: https://www.thesilentwhy.com/post/how-to-build-mental-muscles-when-you-re-feeling-weak

Flexing your mental muscles is like training your body - it takes time and consistency. But once you start, they grow stronger and more reliable. In this episode, I’m sharing the tips and tools that helped me through tough times, including practical ways to stay grounded and protect your sanity and your relationships.

Think of this as a mental workout: exercises to support you when your mind feels hormonal/confused/frustrated/depressed/griefy [you fill in the gap].

For more on the Amiko Cards I mention: https://www.littlechallenges.com/store

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Support the show

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thesilentwhy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter | LinkedIn

What's a Herman? / Buy a Herman - thehermancompany.com

Support the show: buymeacoffee.com/thesilentwhy

Sign-up to my mailing list (only used for sharing news occasionally!): thesilentwhy.com/newsletter

How to talk to the grieving: thesilentwhy.com/post/howtotalktothegrieving

Review the show: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Goodpods

Episode transcripts: thesilentwhy.buzzsprout.com

Thank you for listening.