In this honest and deeply reflective episode, Jay explores how grief doesn’t just take—it reshapes. After the loss of his wife Christine, Jay found himself facing a deep question: “Who am I now?”

Grief may feel like it’s stealing everything familiar—purpose, peace, even identity—but it can also become a teacher. Jay unpacks how sorrow can actually refine us, drawing us back to the truth of who we are in Christ.

This episode digs into the pain and purpose of lament, the redemptive power of God’s compassion, and the unshakable foundation of sonship in the middle of identity-shifting loss. Whether you're grieving or walking with someone who is, you’ll find encouragement, truth, and grace here.

In this honest and deeply personal episode, Jay shares about one of the least-discussed aspects of grief: sexual bereavement and Widower’s Fire—the overwhelming longing for intimacy after the death of a spouse.

This episode opens the door to a conversation many avoid—especially in the church—and offers encouragement, grace, and practical steps for Christian men navigating this form of loss. Jay speaks vulnerably about the loneliness that comes with losing not just a partner, but the physical, emotional, and spiritual connection that intimacy brought to marriage.

Whether you’re a widower, a friend, a pastor, or someone trying to better support those in grief, this episode offers something vital: permission to name what hurts, space to be seen, and hope that God meets us even in the most uncomfortable places.

Giving Space to Grieve Honestly

In this heartfelt episode, Jay shares a vulnerable and honest conversation around the well-meaning but often painful things people say to those who are grieving. Drawing from personal experience, he offers real-life examples, simple responses, and a call to compassion.

More than a list of what not to say, this episode is an invitation—to walk gently with the grieving, to give them space to feel, and to resist the urge to “fix” what can’t be fixed. Jay also speaks candidly about what it means to move forward in grief while still deeply feeling the weight of loss—and how sadness and faith can live side by side.

Whether you’re grieving or supporting someone who is, this episode offers grace, understanding, and practical insight for the journey.

In this deeply personal episode, Jay explores the often-overlooked emotional terrain of grief—especially for men. Through raw honesty and spiritual reflection, he unpacks how emotions aren’t enemies to conquer, but messengers to learn from. Jay shares how he uses his pain as fuel for healing, creativity, and worship, offering practical ways to process sorrow without shame. From quiet tears to riverbank outbursts, this episode is a powerful reminder that regulating emotions is not weakness—it’s worship.

Whether you’re grieving or supporting someone who is, this conversation offers hope, direction, and space to feel.

In this special post-Easter edition of the NEXT Podcast, Jay shares raw, honest reflections recorded the day after Resurrection Sunday. After taking time away to intentionally reflect on Holy Week, Jay opens up about where he is in his grief journey—five years, four months, and six days after Christine’s passing.

This “Current Mood” episode explores themes of resilience over recovery, how love—not just faith—has carried him through the darkest seasons, and why choosing life each day is an act of worship.

Jay also shares a deeply personal story about Christine’s childhood dream of becoming a ballerina, how she lived out that dream in grace and spirit, and what that means for those of us learning to dance with grief.

If you’ve ever wondered how to hold both sorrow and joy, how to walk in resurrection power even when your heart is breaking—this episode is for you.

https://jaycookingham.com

In this episode of the NEXT Podcast, we continue exploring the myths surrounding grief—especially the pressure to “move on,” or “find closure,” and the belief that time alone brings healing.

I share honestly about what it means to live with loss beyond the first year, the unexpected ways pain deepens over time and how embracing that pain with God’s presence can actually grow your capacity for joy.

This episode is raw, reflective, and rooted in hope. If you’ve ever felt like your grief doesn’t fit a timeline, this conversation is for you.

Grief doesn’t follow the rulebook. In this episode of the NEXT podcast, host Jay Cookingham unpacks one of the biggest myths about grief—the idea that it moves in predictable stages. Society tells us we should process loss in a neat, orderly way, but real grief is messy, unpredictable, and deeply personal. Jay shares his own journey, challenging the common misconceptions that hold us back from healing and offering a perspective rooted in faith and hope. If you’ve ever felt like you’re “grieving wrong,” this episode is for you.

Grief isn’t just about losing a spouse—it’s about losing all the roles they filled in your life. One of the deepest losses I’ve faced is losing Christine not only as my wife, but as my sister in Christ—the one who prayed with me, encouraged me, and challenged me in my faith.

In this episode, I reflect on:

• How Christine’s faith and friendship shaped our marriage

• Why losing a spouse changes every other relationship in your life

• The struggle of missing spiritual intimacy and deep conversations

• How grief unravels us—but how God is knitting something new together

• What it means to bring this kind of loss to Jesus and worship Him there

For those who have lost a spouse, a best friend, or a spiritual companion, I see you. You don’t have to carry this grief alone. Join me as I process this layer of loss and seek hope in the presence of God.

Listen now and take the next step forward in your grief journey.