
The 3 Instincts That Shape Your Enneagram Type
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Unpack the hidden drives that shape how your Enneagram type shows up in life and leadership.
Have you ever met someone who shares your Enneagram type but acts nothing like you? You might have thought, ‘Wait — are we even the same type?’ That’s the magic of instincts. Instincts explain why two people of the same type can have totally different priorities, fears, and energy. This is another powerful aspect of doing the work of you – both your core motivation and your dominant instinct act automatically, like how patterns can work as we discussed in ep 4. The drive of your motivation is there to protect you and your instinct works similarly – it’s an unconscious reaction – operating like an animalistic instinct. Both your motivation and instinct can take over and run your life if you’re not aware and don’t learn to manage them…so it’s critical to understand which is your dominant instinct and then how to tame it. Be sure to check out Episode 5 to learn more about the Enneagram model and how it works.
Episode topics:
Each of us has all three instincts, but one is usually dominant, one is secondary, and one is least developed or in psychology terms it’s repressed.
1. Self-Preservation (SP): survival instinct – the drive is meeting individual needs, fear is not surviving
- Focus: well being, physical safety, comfort, security, structure. Energy is more conservative, serious, slow and grounded.
2. Social (SO): drive is the group will prevail – everything for the greater good with a focus on ALL, fear of not belonging
- Focus: belonging, status, group dynamics, big ideas and ideals; energy: externalized, spread wide, can be scattered/confused, political
3. Sexual / One-to-One (SX): the drive is to bond and fuse; fear is not being wanted
- Focus: intimate or intense or energizing experiences and connections with another; energy is passionate, high energy, intense, competitive, faster pace
Learn how to use your 3 instincts for growth and what each instinct looks like when combined with the main Enneagram type (1-9).
Coaching Prompts:
- Which instinct feels most like home to you?
- If SF: play with going without one of your comforts or routines for a week or try focusing on someone else’s needs or desires over your own.
- If SX: play with moving at a slower pace and finding something to do alone that brings you joy.
- If SO: play with prioritizing you over everyone else and not advocating for anything on anyone else's' behalf for a little while.
- Consider which instinct feels least relatable to you and noodle on how that may be impacting you.
Resources | Links:
Episode 5: Why The Enneagram is a Leadership Superpower (overview of the model).
Website | The Enneagram 9 Types
GET YOUR ENNEAGRAM TYPE -- includes the Instinct data; most ideal for professional use: leaders and teams
ALT OPTION FOR TYPING - also includes the Instincts
Book | The Enneagram Guide to Waking Up: Find Your Path, Face your Shadow, Discover Your True Self By, Beatrice Chestnut, PhD and Uranio Peas, MM
The Grow Effect Coaching Model
Instagram | The Work of You
Instagram | Grow Collective