As a kid, you likely knew you were loved. But did you also know that you were lovable no matter what?

We didn’t always get that message growing up, as we’ve since learned about one another. But we are all worthy of love, just as we are. So how do we internalize this as adults, and pass along the right message to our kids?

With our tenth episode, Loved & Lovable, we’re introducing a new arc at The Most Important Thing, using Brené Brown’s Wholehearted Parenting Manifesto as our compass.

"Above all else, I want you to know that you are loved and lovable. You will learn this from my words and actions — the lessons on love are in how I treat you and how I treat myself."

So, how might we distinguish between loved and lovable within our family?

❤️ Loved = the feeling that someone is deeply here for you.
It’s love coming toward you—through care, protection, and presence.

• “I love you, and I’ll hold your hand at the doctor.”
• “I love you, and I believe in you, even when you’re scared.”

It’s not just words—it’s follow-through, especially when things are messy.

💗 Lovable = the belief that you are worthy of love, just as you are.
It’s not earned through behavior, helpfulness, or performance—it’s part of a wholehearted identity.

We talk about what it means to “know that you are lovable” and play around with some language experiments—

• Replacing “I love you, but…” with “I love you, therefore…”
• Being more descriptive with how we express love

We also explore presence, repair, and what it means to be a family that doesn’t just feel loved—but where each member believes they’re lovable.

This one’s softer, slower, and full of heart. Thanks for being here with us.

With so much love,
Danielle + Greg