Dr. Doug Bolton is the Director of School Consultation at Formative Psychological Services, a mental health clinic offering therapy, neuropsychological assessments, and consultation services to individuals, families, and schools. With over 30 years of experience, Dr. Bolton has worked extensively with children, adolescents, couples, and families, focusing on improving coping mechanisms through a family therapy model. Prior to his current role, he served as a Psychologist and Principal at North Shore Academy, a K-12 therapeutic school, for more than two decades. Dr. Bolton is also the author of Untethered: Creating Connected Families, Schools, and Communities to Raise a Resilient Generation, a book that addresses the mental health challenges facing adolescents today

Many parents believe the best way to secure their child’s future is to push them toward academic excellence, elite colleges, and high achievement from an early age. However, this well-intentioned pressure may be doing more harm than good. How does this narrow path to success undermine kids’ mental health and well-being?

According to Dr. Doug Bolton, a clinical psychologist and national consultant on student mental health, the pressure to succeed can erode resilience and increase anxiety. Students in affluent communities are classified as an at-risk group due to overwhelming stress tied to performance, status, and scarcity mindsets. When children equate their self-worth with achievements — grades, sports, or selective colleges — they lose the opportunity to develop emotional regulation and coping skills. This constant striving can damage relationships, distort priorities, and stunt healthy development. Instead, growth happens when kids are allowed to fail, face discomfort, and feel supported, not rescued, through it.

In this episode of The Coping Podcast, Dr. Leigh Weisz sits down with Dr. Doug Bolton, Director of School Consultation at Formative Psychological Services, to talk about how to raise resilient kids without crushing them with achievement pressure. They explore the myth of elite colleges as success guarantees, how perfectionism can limit growth, and why distress tolerance is essential to mental health. Dr. Bolton also shares how parents can shift from outcome-based to process-focused support.