Back to the bread and butter on Finding a Football Club as Luke and Jay weigh up Harrogate Town and MK Dons in their hunt for a team to love.

One’s a quaint Yorkshire spa town with a football club nobody remembers exists. The other’s a loathed plastic franchise that’s football’s answer to identity theft. It's artisan chutney and National Trust memberships vs relocation, relocation, relocation.

Plus, Luke plays his innuendo-heavy phone call with Fleetwood’s filthiest receptionist and the lads play Someone Said You Were Dead, where they try to track down footballers they were convinced had retired.

This week on Finding a Football Club, it’s just Luke and Will. No Jay, no distractions, and no legal team present.

Before Will swans off around Europe, the lads go full fanboy and name their all-time best XIs. Will picks Arsenal. Luke picks Chelsea. Then, like true football snobs, they argue over who actually qualifies as world-class.

Then things turn toxic as Luke digs up Arsenal’s most embarrassing forgotten men, whilst Will retaliates with a Chelsea XI so uninspiring it could trigger PTSD in any Blues fan. That’s right, it’s the return of Khalid Boulahrouz.

Elsewhere, the boys go completely off-piste pondering Matthew Broderick’s shady driving history, debating whether Dennis Bergkamp was just vibes, revisiting Robert Huth’s involvement in Cock or No Cock, outing a certain Chelsea player who sold his soul to the devil, and investigating whether John Terry was actually racist (spoiler: obviously).

This week on Finding a Football Club, Luke, Jay and Will throw three more teams into a ring and see which bloodied victor staggers out.

In the firing line are the teenage pregnancy Holy Trinity: Fleetwood Town, Gillingham and Grimsby Town.

Getting distracted, the lads question if Jamie Carragher was actually any good, guess some One Cap Wonders, unpack Jay’s unsettling obsession with Titus Bramble, talk trams, investigate a smutty stadium review, and try to catch a predator spotted at a Grimsby match eight years ago.